


A Royal Appointment

by Gamester4



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, F/F, Medic!Clarke, More tags will be added as necessary, Royal!Lexa, Slow Burn, at least in regards to death, bodyguard!Clarke, like really slow at the rate I'm going, no wlw were harmed in the making of this fic
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-04-22
Updated: 2017-04-03
Packaged: 2018-06-02 22:37:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 13
Words: 13,627
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6585361
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gamester4/pseuds/Gamester4
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Inspired by this post here http://everybodyhatesjroth.tumblr.com/post/142904734269/the-great-gay-migration</p><p>Clarke is a combat medic in her country's military. She's injured while fighting against The Mountain and is sent back to Polis to become a member of the palace guard.</p><p>Lexa is a member of the royal family whose last bodyguard left the Grounder unit. Clarke gets assigned to it.</p><p>Let's see how this goes!</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys, this is my first attempt at a fanfic. Hopefully I'm able to do the characters justice as we go through this.

Clarke heard the rock split right beside her head before she heard the crack of the rifle off in the distance. Her unit was currently on patrol at the edge of The Mountain’s territory and it seemed that they had come across one of their counterparts. She quickly ducked behind a large boulder as the rest of her platoon took cover and returned fire. Raven had been right next to her, but when she looked around she couldn’t find her initially. Eventually her eyes settled on the brunette where she was laying out in the open.

Clarke’s medic training kicked in as she scrambled to get to Raven. Bullets whizzed past her, but she quickly grabbed her friend and pulled her behind the boulder. She quickly starts assessing Reyes wincing when she notices where she had been shot.

“Stay with me Reyes.” She says as she busts out her medical kit. “We’re going to get you out of here safe and sound.”

The brown haired girl can only moan in pain as Clarke tries to patch her up as well as she can. Raven had a bullet hole in her back and Clarke was applying pressure as best she could, but she wasn’t sure what the internal damage would be. Clarke looked around frantically as she noticed more of her teammates getting hit.

“Damnit.” she muttered, realizing that they needed backup. She looked to her left and noticed that their radio operator was slumped against a rock. By the way he looked her trained eye could tell that if he wasn’t dead he was going to be soon. Clarke poked her head out from behind her rock to see if she could make a break towards him. She’d done all she could for Raven and now had to get them all out of there.

Taking a deep breath to steady herself, Clarke burst from behind her cover and scrambled to where the radio was. She quickly grabbed the microphone and depressed the talk button.

“This is Sergeant Griffin of Skaikru 1. We’re pinned down on the south edge of Wallace Canyon! Require medevac and close air support! Enemy is located directly across the canyon.” she shouted.

“Roger Skaikru 1. Medevac and CAS is on their way. How many wounded?” came the reply.

“We have…” Clarke started to look around to see how many of her comrades were injured, but her vision was starting to go blurry. She looked down and noticed that there was fresh blood on her uniform. That part wasn’t so weird considering she’d been patching up Raven, but then she noticed the hole in her uniform and the shooting pain that was starting to hit her. Apparently she’d been hit when she made her sprint to the radio, and now she was starting to pass out from shock. The last thing she heard before everything went black was the thud of the helicopter blades as they came over the valley.

 

The next thing Clarke heard was the steady beep of a heart rate monitor. She slowly opened her eyes, and the first thing she saw was the sterile white ceiling of a hospital room.

“Where…where am I?” she croaked, her voice cracking from the lack of use.

“Oh thank goodness, you’re awake.” Clarke looked over to where she had heard her mother’s voice. Abby Griffin didn’t often look worried, but right now her face showed the signs of it.

“Mom? Am I back home?” Clarke asked.

“No, you’re in Polis at Polis General. You were medevacked back here after your platoon was attacked.”

“Oh…wait!” Clarke tried to shoot up, but was stopped by the combination of pain from her stomach and her mom’s hand on her shoulder pushing her back down. “Damnit, what happened to Raven?”

“Corporal Reyes is here as well…” Abby said, her voice twinging with some sadness. “She’s alive, but she might not have full use of her leg anymore. The doctors won’t know for sure until she’s awake.”

“Well, look who’s awake.” Clarke looked up and saw what she assumed was her doctor. He was wearing a white lab coat over a set of teal scrubs. On his lab coat he had a name tag embroidered on that said “Doctor Wells Jaha”.

“Were you worried I wasn’t going to wake up Wells?” Clarke smirked up at her old friend. It’d been a while since she’d seen him, but apparently he’d done well for himself after leaving Arkadia.

“Not really.” Wells replied as he looked over her vitals and checked the bandage on her stomach. “You were shot in the stomach nowhere near a vital organ or any major blood vessels or arteries. People don’t die from wounds like that unless there’s no medical personnel nearby.” He gave her a smile. “You should be fine to go by the end of the day.”

“Will I be going back to my unit?” Clarke asked, though she figured he would probably either not be able to tell her, or not allowed to.

“No.” Clarke looked over at her mom in surprise when she answered. “Sorry, they dropped off the envelope and I opened it.” she said. “You’re actually being transferred to the Grounder Corps.”

Clarke’s jaw nearly hit her hospital bed. “The Grounder Corps?” she asked incredulously. “But that’s the palace guard. Why would they want me? I’m just a medic.”

“You’d be surprised at how many of the Grounder Corps are trained medics. They’re the first line of treatment in case of an attack on the royal family. They’re better than most civilian paramedics.” Wells responded. “But you won’t be taking your post until your bullet hole is closed up more.”

“Fiiiiiine.” Clarke responded as she took a drink of the water offered to her by Abby. “I think I’m going to rest some more.”

“That sounds like a good idea Clarke. I’ll come in to check up on you before you leave.” Wells said before exiting the room.

Clarke rested her head against her pillow and was instantly asleep. Her mother shook her head as she set the water cup down and sat back in her chair, happy that her daughter was going to be ok.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 2 finds us with Clarke recovered from her wound, Raven starting her recovery, and the beginning of Clarke's first day as a Grounder.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you guys so much for the comments and kudos on the last chapter! I smiled every time I saw a new comment come in. Hope you guys enjoy this chapter!

Even though she’d been discharged, Clarke still spent the better part of the next three weeks at the hospital. When she wasn’t at an appointment to check on the progress of her wound she was sitting in Raven’s room. The bullet had clipped her spine and she was barely able to use or feel her left leg.

“So, when are you going back to the unit?” Raven asked Clarke on her last free day before she was to report in to the Grounders. The color had returned to her skin, and she had even been allowed to explore the hospital for a little bit.

“Actually…” Clarke said, looking up from her sketch book and giving Raven a warm smile. “I’m not going back to our unit. I’ve been given a new assignment.”

“Really?” Raven asked, sitting up a little bit in her bed. “When do you ship out?”

“My assignment starts tomorrow. I’ve been appointed to the Grounder Corps.”

“The Grounder Corps? That’s…amazing.” Raven says, smiling. “Means you’ll still be able to visit me.”

“Of course. Every step of the way.” Clarke placed a reassuring hand on her friend’s arm.

 

Clarke’s alarm went off far earlier than she wanted it to, but she couldn’t afford to be late. It was her first official day as a member of the Grounder Corps. They were the elite soldiers who protected the Royal Family, and she was the first Arkadian to be appointed to it. It’d been about 100 years since Arkadia had been annexed by the Kingdom of Trigeda, and there were still people in Arkadia that felt the need to “carry on the fight” as they put it. According to the Royal Army though, it was just terrorism. So whenever Arkadians enlisted they had a tendency to be lumped into their own units. Made for good unit cohesion, but also sometimes led to them being used in more dangerous situations.

After taking a shower and getting dressed, Clarke found herself walking up to the barracks of her new assignment. She took a deep breath, squared her shoulders, and walked up to the security checkpoint.

“Staff Sergeant Clarke Griffin.” She said, trying to exude more confidence than she really had. She’d been promoted along with this new assignment so her new rank sounded foreign to her coming out of her mouth. “I’m the new appointee.”

The soldier at the checkpoint took her paperwork and looked it over. Apparently it all checked out to him because he took his radio out and spoke into it.

“Lieutenant Woods, the new medics here.” He said, his voice deep and rough.

“Thank you Gustus.” The response crackled back. “Send her up, I’ll meet her at the door.”

The man, Gustus, Clarke corrected herself, stood up. He was a stupendously large man, but his eyes looked like the eyes of someone that you could talk to if you needed it. “Go straight down this path, the main door will be on your right.” he said as he pointed. “Lieutenant Woods will be waiting there for you.”

“Thank you Master Sergeant…” Clarke looked for a name patch on his uniform.

“Masterson. You’ll find some things are different here Staff Sergeant.” Gustus replied.

“Well thank you Sergeant Masterson.” Clarke said as she walked towards the door. When she got there the door swung open and the first thing she noticed was that it looked to be about 2 feet thick. The second thing she noticed was the woman who was on the other side of it. Her cheekbones looked like they could actually cut through the door.

“You must be Lieutenant Woods.” Clarke said as she held out her hand. “I’m”

“Staff Sergeant Griffin, I know.” the woman said, not taking her hand. “Follow me.” She turned on her heel and walked into the building.

Clarke followed her quickly, worried that she’d made a bad first impression. Looking around as she followed Lieutenant Woods she was amazed at what she saw. It was part barracks, part command center, part armory, and all around full of dangerous things and people. Eventually she found herself in what looked to be an office. On the door was a plaque that said “Lieutenant Anya Woods”.

“So, you’re the new chick.” Anya said as she took her seat, motioning for Clarke to sit down in front of her desk.

“Yes ma’am.” Clarke responded. “I look forward to working with you all.”

“That makes about one of us.” Anya spoke with very little emotion, which unnerved Clarke a little bit.

Clarke had to fight to keep a sigh from escaping her lips. She should’ve figured something like this might’ve come up.

“Is it because I’m Arkadian?” she asked, keeping eye contact with Anya.

“Partially, and partially because you got promoted because you got shot.”

“It’s not like I asked to be placed here.” Clarke said, getting a little bit angry. She may have gotten shot, but she was still good at what she did. She had graduated from medic school top of her class. While it wasn’t the doctor’s job her mom had wanted for her, she was still helping people and serving them. Of course her enlistment had been spur of the moment when she was at a low point in her life, but it had turned out ok. She’d met Raven and Octavia through it, and they’d helped her put her life back into some semblance of order.

“I know, but that doesn’t mean I and anyone else here is just going to accept you being assigned here, but you’re lucky, Princess Alexandria’s previous bodyguard was recently injured and was forced to retire. Once you get trained up, you’ll be her new main bodyguard.”

“Me?” Clarke couldn’t keep the surprise out of her voice. “Why me? I’m just a”

“Medic, you’re a medic. The royal family’s main bodyguards are always medics. You can shoot a gun right?”  
Clarke blinked at the sudden swerve. “Um…I qualified in basic training, but I really haven’t handled a gun since then. I mean…”

“I know, medics don’t carry guns. Here though? You’ll have to. We can’t have any part of the protection net unarmed. There’s dangers out there and we need everyone ready. That’ll be part of your training.” Anya said. “But first, here’s your new uniform.” She got up and grabbed a garment bag and handed it to Clarke who had stood up as well. “I’ll lead you to your room. Change, and then I’ll take you to meet your new charge.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I promise that the next chapter will have our first Clexa interaction!


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Anya takes Clarke to meet Princess Alexandria kom Trikru while giving her a crash course in royal etiquette. Lexa attempts to get to know Clarke.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay guys! This was a busy weekend for me and the chapter kinda got away from me.

Clarke looked at herself in the full length mirror in her barracks room. She had changed into the typical Grounder uniform, a floor length black trench coat with hardened shoulder pads covering black pants and a fitted black shirt. She looked at herself curiously, wondering how any of this was supposed to protect her, or how she’d be able to keep cool in the summer months. Polis had a reputation for getting hot during the summer. Though, Clarke did have to admit she looked badass in this set up. She was amazed that it fit her so well.

She stepped out of her room and nearly ran into Anya. “Oh, I was just about to go find you Lieutenant.” she said, trying to not look flustered.

“I know approximately how long it takes for someone to get into their uniform. Glad to see we got your measurements correct.” Anya said as she started walking.

Clarke quickly caught up to her, matching her pace. “How do you guys stay safe in these uniforms? Seems like you’d die from either heat stroke or a gunshot.”

“Latest in armor technology. The fabric hardens on impact, you’ll still get a bruise, but probably not get you killed. And as to the heat, you get used to it. And the moisture wicking properties of the fabric works wonders.” Anya replied as she kept leading Clarke down into the bowels of the building. “So, some things you need to know right now. When addressing the Princess, she is Your Royal Highness at first, and then ma’am after that. Never address her first, she will talk to you.”

“Ok.” Clarke replied, raising an eyebrow as Anya opened a door and led them into a tunnel.

“This tunnel leads directly to the royal palace.” Anya said, leading her on. “In the case of an emergency you are to bring Her Royal Highness down here and back to the barracks.”

“Expecting something in the, what I’m assuming is, a short time I’ll be there?” Clarke said. “And isn’t the Palace pretty heavily fortified?”

“No, yes, but the barracks is even more heavily. Also, it allows us to make sure that the entire royal family isn’t killed in one attack.” Anya gave her a look that made it seem like that should be blatantly obvious.

Clarke fought hard to not roll her eyes. She should’ve expected some of this, but she had expected it from the enlisted members, not from one of the officers. She had to bite her cheek to keep from shooting off a smart remark. She followed Anya out of the cart they took down the tunnel and up into the Palace proper and had to keep herself from looking around in awe. It was truly splendid and magnificent. Everything looked regal and Clarke definitely felt out of place.

Anya led her up to a bedroom where a large black man waited outside the door. “Sergeant Lincoln Whittle, this is Staff Sergeant Clarke Griffin.” Anya said to him. “She’s the new medic and will be Princess Alexandria’s new bodyguard.”

“Pleasure to meet you Sergeant Griffin.” Lincoln said as he shook Clarke’s hand. “I look forward to working with you.” Clarke decided she like him a lot better than she like Anya. He certainly looked a lot kinder than she did.

“Pleasure to meet you too Sergeant.” Clarke replied. “Sorry if I’m taking your job.”

“I was temporarily assigned her. Usually I’m the combat instructor.”

“You’ll be getting plenty of practice with him later. Right now we’re here to introduce you to the Princess.” Anya cut in. “Come on.” She opened the door and led Clarke in.

The first thing Clarke noticed was how many candles were lit in the room. It seemed almost every available flat surface had at least one candle on it. “This is really an aggressive amount of candles.” Clarke thought to herself. Or at least she thought she thought it to herself. However, the look Anya was now giving her disabused her of that notion really quick. “I…I thought…” she quickly shut up as Anya glared at her.

They both turned when they heard the shuffle of someone getting up from the floor. Clarke followed Anya’s motions and bowed as Princess Alexandria kom Trikru approached them. When Clarke came up she had to fight really hard from gasping at the sight before her. While she’d seen pictures of the princess, they’d never done the person that stood before her justice. “Damnit Clarke, keep your pants on.” This time Clarke actually did manage to keep her thoughts to herself. The first thing she noticed about the Princess was that her eyes were this amazing green color, brighter than anything she’d seen before. In short, the woman before her was absolutely stunning.

“Lieutenant Woods.” Alexandria said. “To what do I owe the pleasure?”

“Your Royal Highness, this is Staff Sergeant Clarke Griffin. She was recently appointed to be your new bodyguard.” Anya replied deferentially.

“Ah, yes, I remember now. Father mentioned that this morning. And Anya, how long have we known each other?” Clarke watched the back and forth between the two women. “I believe I’ve told you to call me Lexa about forty-three thousand, six hundred and eighty-four times.”

“I believe that’s one more added to that number ma’am.” Anya responded as Lexa rolled her eyes.

“Very well, if you’ll excuse us, I’d like to get to know my new bodyguard a little bit better.” Anya bowed and slowly walked out of the room, leaving Clarke and Lexa alone.

“So, you’re from Arkadia.” Lexa said, almost like a question.

“Is that going to be a problem ma’am?” Clarke snapped back before she could stop herself.

“Please, call me Lexa.” The green eyed girl said. “And I only said that because this is the first time an Arkadian has been appointed to the Grounder Corps.”

“Well, considering the reaction I got from Lieutenant Woods I wouldn’t be surprised if I was the only one.”

“Anya…has a family history with some of your country folk.”

“Don’t we all.” Clarke retorted. “Almost everyone in Arkadia’s been affected by the various paramilitary groups.”

“I know. But sometimes Anya let’s her emotions get the better of her. Her father was a soldier as well, but that’s not my story to tell.” Lexa said.

“I guess I’ll have to wait to hear it then.”

“Yes, you will. So, what else should I know about you that’s not in your file Clarke?” Lexa looked over at her inquisitively.

“I’m not sure what you mean ma’am.” Clarke said getting a raised eyebrow in response. “Do you mean like, if I have any hobbies?”

“Anything like that. I like to get to know my body guards.”

“This…seems a bit weird.” Clarke said as Lexa sat down at the table.

“Well, if it helps you at all, I have a lot of candles because the scents help me meditate. The look of the flames is also soothing to me.”

“Have a lot on your mind?” Clarke asked.

“Always.” Lexa said, looking towards one of the candles on the table. “Heavy is”

“The head that wears the crown.” Clarke finished for her, earning her a raised eyebrow.

“Well, you can finish a quote from Shakespeare, so that’s one thing I know about you.” she said. “I’m guessing that I’m not going to get much more out of you, at least for today. I suspect Lieutenant Woods is behind the door waiting for us to finish so she can get you more up to speed on how we do things here. I won’t keep you from her any longer.”

“Thank you ma’am.” Clarke said, bowing before she left. True enough, when she exited the door Anya was right there waiting for her. Without a word she turned back down the hallway and walked towards the stairs. Clarke gave Lincoln a small smile as she passed by him and quickly headed over to follow Anya.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So there we go! The first of many Clexa interactions! I promise that it'll start to build faster, but apparently I hate myself because my brain was like "Here, this is what you really want to write. A nice, slow, burn. Like, really slow." And of course I apparently had to agree with it. :P


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay guys! I got hit with some writer's block and had to push through it. Here you go!

Lexa sighed as she watched Clarke walk out of her room. The candle comment had been funny she had to admit, but it seemed that Anya had already started the “this is the proper way of addressing the Princess” process, and Anya was good at getting that through her bodyguards. Lexa knew that there was a reason for the distance to be there, she was usually good at maintaining it with the servants in the palace, but the guards were different. They were around her all day every day and sometimes being the Crown Princess was a lonely existence. She tried to get to know them, but to a person they kept their distance.

She knew it wasn’t their fault. Colonel Porter demanded it, and Anya was really good at enforcing Indra’s will on the unit. Still, it’d been a while since she’d had someone she could actually talk to. Probably not since Costia back in college.

Lexa shook her head, pulling herself out of her reminiscing. Yes, the blonde was clearly attractive, but it was never going to happen. First off, a relationship like that would never work with her bodyguard, both of them needed to have clear minds. Second, Lexa was pretty sure her parents would freak if they found out she was in a relationship with a “simple soldier” as they would put it.

Lexa returned to where she had been seated, breathing in to try to clear her thoughts again.

 

Clarke took the passenger seat of the cart next to Anya as they drove back to the barracks. She hadn’t asked Clarke anything, so Clarke didn’t feel the need to share anything with her at the moment. She stayed silent in thought when she got back to the barracks and went to her room. Her next scheduled event was the start of her combat training after lunch, so she decided to take the time to study up on how to interact with the Royal Family.

Anya had been so gracious as to give her a book titled “Proper Etiquette and the Royal Family” and if Clarke had thought she’d had to read some dense material back during her college days it was nothing compared to the book in front of her. It was easily a 5 pound book and looking at the table of contents it seemed to cover just about every conceivable situation one could find themselves in, up to and including “Spilled Peanut Butter on Blouse.” Clarke had to chuckle at that one mainly because she couldn’t imagine anyone from the Royal Family actually eating peanut butter.

After lunch Clarke went down to the combat training room. She was surprised to see Lincoln down there, even though he had said he was the combat instructor, he had also been on door duty for Lexa.

“Lieutenant Woods needed to discuss some details about the Princess’ schedule with her.” He said almost like he could read her mind. “Until you’re fully ready people will be trading off.”

“Sorry for the inconvenience.” Clarke snapped a little bit ruder than she intended, wincing.

Lincoln just shrugged it off. “You were selected for your medical abilities. It’s easier to teach someone to fight than it is to teach them how to keep a spinal injury from becoming full paralysis in the field.”

“Well, it’s not like I’m coming from a totally neutral background.” Clarke said. “I had to go through basic training.”

“I think you’ll find that there’s a pretty big difference between what you were taught to survive out in the field, and what I’m going to be teaching you down here.”  
And he was absolutely right. Clarke hadn’t been as sore as she was right now ever in her life. Lincoln had definitely put her through her paces, and while she had definitely learned some new stuff, she quickly realized that she was going to need a lot of training before she could justifiably say that she was proficient. Luckily, Lincoln explained to her that she’d have time to learn, and that most of the time her duties wouldn’t require her to actually get into hand to hand combat.

Clarke was brought out of her thinking spell when she nearly ran over a person coming the other direction. “Sorry.” She started to say before she realized who it was. “Your Royal Highness.” She stuttered out, trying not to embarrass herself. Lexa was dressed in workout clothing and Clarke had to do her damnedest to make sure she wasn’t staring.

“Clarke.” Lexa replied. “How was your first day on the job?”

“Um…tiring.” Clarke admitted. “Luckily after dinner I’m done for the day ma’am.”

“Ah, I just finished up with my workout as well. Would you care to join me for dinner?”

“I...is that proper ma’am?” Clarke asked, not wanting to incur Anya’s wrath.

“I’m the Crown Princess, I’m fairly certain I can do what I want. And don’t worry about Anya, she knows I always like to have dinner with my bodyguards.”

“Then let me get presentable and I’ll join you ma’am.” Clarke said.

“You don’t have to worry about that. The mess hall here has a private room for me to eat in. It’s not uncommon for me to be here.”

“Wait…won’t your parents want you to join them for dinner?” Clarke asked. “Ma’am.”

“They have a charity gala tonight.”

“And you’re not going?” Clarke raised an eyebrow.

“I have my own charities that I support. There’s a couple that we fundraise for jointly, but we like to have diversity when it comes to where we throw our weight.” Lexa shrugged.

“Ah, that makes sense ma’am.” Clarke had to keep reminding herself to add ma’am when she was finished addressing Lexa, that was going to be something that would take a while she thought.

Lexa smiled and started walking towards the mess hall and Clarke followed. It seemed the end of the day was going to be a little bit better than the beginning.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once again, I'm sorry for the delay, but I wanted this to be as good as possible, and had to figure out where I was going with it. Once again comments are always appreciated! And thank you for the supportive comments on the last few chapters.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay. Writer's block always seems to hit me.

Dinner with Lexa was actually really fun. The food certainly was better, but the company was actually really great. Lexa was certainly making an attempt at conversation.

“So, did you always want to be a medic in the army?” Lexa asked over her glass of wine.

“No, I was actually doing pre-med in college before I dropped out and enlisted.” Clarke said, taking a sip of her soda. Hopefully the conversation would go somewhere else soon.

“Why’d you drop out?” Lexa asked. “From what I can tell you would’ve been a great doctor.”

Clarke kept her face up, even though she wanted nothing more than to hide. “It’s…I was in a bad place when I dropped out.”

“Oh…sorry.” Lexa’s face dropped a bit. “I didn’t mean to overstep.”

“It’s ok. My father was killed in an ARA bombing. It won’t affect my duties.” Clarke sighed. It’d been years since the bombing, but Clarke still hadn’t gotten over what had happened. It’d been why she’d run off to the Army.

“That’s not what I meant, but I’m glad for that.” Lexa replied. “I just wanted to be sure you were ok.” She smiled.

“Ah, thank you ma’am.” Clarke said, noticing the smile lessen a little bit when she said that. “I miss him, but it gets better as the years go by.”

“Well, that’s good.” Lexa said as she went back to her food.

The small talk kept going for a while as they ate, neither of them going any deeper than “what’s your favorite color?” or “what pets did you have growing up?” Clarke felt at ease for the first time since she got there. At least, until the alarm went off.

“That’s a lockdown alarm.” Lexa said as Clarke was immediately on her feet.

“Come on ma’am.” Clarke said, taking Lexa’s hand and dragging her from the mess hall. She ignored the spark that touching Lexa’s hand caused in her as six more Grounders formed up beside them as soon as they left the room.

Clarke quickly walked down to the bunker and locked herself and Lexa in, the other guards taking up positions outside in the hall. She turned around and noticed that Lexa was staring at the monitors that covered the opposite wall. There was a breaking news bulletin currently up, showing a building that was on fire from an explosion.

“What’s happening?” Clarke said quietly.

“The gala was attacked.”

Clarke spun around to look at who was walking in the bunker door and noticed Anya was there with Gustus and Lincoln. They looked worried.

“My parents?” Lexa asked, a slight crack in her voice.

“We’re still waiting on confirmation Your Highness.” Anya replied, keeping her voice level.

“Ok…” Lexa slowly sat down in a chair, continuing to watch the screens in front of her.

They all waited there, the four guards and Lexa until Anya received a message over her radio. Before Clarke could ask what the message was she found herself pinned to the wall with Anya’s arm against her throat and Anya’s face close up with hers.

“Did you know anything about this?!” Anya said, barely concealing her rage.

“What? Why? Why would I know anything?” Clarke choked out before Gustus and Lincoln came out of their surprised state and pulled Anya off of her. Clarke rubbed her throat where Anya had been choking her.

“The Arkadian Republican Army is taking credit for the bombing.” Anya spat, still looking murderously at Clarke.

“And what, just because I’m Arkadian means I know what the hell they’re doing?!” Clarke snapped back, not caring about her tone around Lexa or at her superior officer. “I have no love for the ARA, and if you’d paid attention to my file you’d know exactly why!” Clarke had worked herself up into a frenzy and was shouting.

“Clarke, Anya.” Lexa said in a soothing tone. “Please calm down. Clarke, Anya’s jumpy around Arkadians because of family members she’s lost.” She put a hand up to keep Clarke from responding. “Anya,” she said as she turned toward the lieutenant. “Clarke as also experienced loss at the hands of the ARA, she wouldn’t have been involved in this.”

Anya finally relaxed and Gustus and Lincoln relaxed their grips on her shoulders. “I’m sorry.” she said. “I overreacted.”  
“I forgive you.” Clarke said. “I know how it can feel sometimes.”

They all eventually took a seat around the conference table that Lexa had sat down at. Occasionally messages would come over Anya’s radio, but nothing definitive had come out about the attack. Eventually Lexa muted the monitors, instead picking a book from the bookshelf built into one of the walls. She was resigning herself to a long night in the bunker and the book might help her relax as she awaited word on her parents.

Anya had taken to pacing, occasionally speaking quietly into her radio in response to whatever messages she was getting from it. A look of worry was constantly plastered on her face as they waited.

Eventually they all heard the door to the bunker open, and turned toward it. A tall dark skinned woman walked through, the rank patches on her shoulder armor announcing to everyone that this was Colonel Indra Porter, head of the Grounder Corps. They all looked at her expectantly, hoping that she brought good news. The look on her face warned them otherwise. They had all stood up when she had entered and they watched as Indra walked up to Lexa, who was currently trying to hold back the tears in her eyes, as if she already knew what was about to happen. Clarke was still holding out hope that there was some way that this could all be ok and that everything was going to go back to normal, if with a bit of heightened security. However, when Indra kneeled before Lexa and spoke Clarke knew that it wasn’t going to be ok, and it might never be ok for Lexa ever again.

“The Queen is dead.” Indra said, trying to keep her voice calm. “Long live the Queen.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please don't hate me.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lexa has a meeting to discuss the immediate fallout from the bombing. Clarke unsuccessfully tries to get Lexa to open up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I didn't forget about this! I just had a difficult time trying to figure out how to write and what I wanted this chapter to be.

_“The Queen is dead. Long live the Queen.”_

Those words rang hollow in Lexa’s ears. She watched as Anya, Lincoln, Gustus, and Clarke all knelt and repeated them. Lexa knew what those words meant and how she wanted to react to them, but she couldn’t. She was the Queen now, and she had a duty to her people. Instead of the tears she wanted to cry she felt her features become stone, blocking the world out from her emotions. She hated it. She hated it, but she had a duty to her people. She was responsible for an entire nation now, and she couldn’t let her emotions cloud her judgement. As she looked at the faces of the people in the bunker with her, she saw a mixture of emotions. It had to be almost as hard for them as it was for her. Her parents had been the most loved royal couple in 50 years, but they were gone now. The weight of ruling the kingdom, of waging the war against the Mountain and the Arkadian Republican Army, and of leading a nation in mourning was now on her shoulders, but she wasn’t allowing herself to show it.

“We need to make sure that the Mountain isn’t going to try to take advantage of our situation. And we need to figure out who the people responsible for this are. I also need to meet with the Royal Ministry and figure out an appropriate response.” Lexa finally said to them. “We can’t afford to look weak.”

Clarke spoke up before anyone else had a chance. “Lexa, it’s ok to mourn.” Lexa fixed her with a glare. “I…I mean Your Majesty.” She quickly corrected herself. “My apologies.”

“I have a duty to make sure that my people are safe.” Lexa responded. “I can’t afford to look weak now.”

Lexa squashed down the disappointment she felt when she saw Clarke’s face drop. Turning to Indra she said “I meant that, get me Minister Kane now.”

“As you wish Your Majesty.” Indra replied before walking out.

“I’m going to get changed and meet him at the Palace.” Lexa said. She walked out of the bunker, followed swiftly by Clarke. They stopped off to let Clarke get into her uniform before taking the cart back to the Palace. They stayed silent the entire ride until Clarke parked the cart under the palace.

“Your Majesty, I know this isn’t my place.” Clarke said.

“You’re right, it’s not Sergeant Griffin. I will be fine.” Lexa strode quickly back to her chambers, followed by Clarke. She changed and made sure her hair was presentable before walking with Clarke to the main conference room in the palace. Already waiting there was Marcus Kane, Lexa’s Mom’s, no, Lexa’s Royal Minister. She had to keep that in mind now.

“Thank you for meeting me on such short notice Minister. I hope I didn’t wake you.” Lexa said to him.

“It’s alright Your Majesty. We can postpone this to later this morning if you want to get some rest.”

“I can rest later, right now my nation needs me.”

“As you wish ma’am.” Kane said as he flipped open his folder.

 

They discussed their plans for statements to be made and what needed to be done about the ARA. Clarke tried to pay as much attention as she could, but until recently she’d never been too interested in politics. She did know that opinion in Arkadia in regards to the ARA and it’s various splinter groups was intensely split between those that were fine with remaining inside Trigeda, those that wanted peaceful independence, and those that felt that blood was the only way Arkadia would be free again. Of course, many in the “peaceful” were just political fronts for the ARA, but it could be hard to tell.

All Clarke knew for sure was that the ARA was responsible for her father’s death and she’d joined the military so it wasn’t like she was really in a position to argue that Arkadia should break off and be its own nation again. And really, all that mattered right now was keeping the Queen safe.

Finding herself a bit bored she found herself with a sheet of paper that had been left in the conference room as well as a spare pencil. Art had always been her escape before, whether it was from the stress of school, or during her precious free time in basic training. She hadn’t been able to do it as much since being in the army proper, but she felt that now was as good a time as any to get back to it since it seemed this meeting was going to go on for a while. So she looked down at her paper and started drawing, just letting her inner muse guide her hand. Eventually she was able to make out what she was starting to draw and realized who it was. She wondered how it was that Lexa was the first thing that she drew.

 

After 5 hours discussing and planning with Minister Kane, Lexa felt good enough about the plans to try and get some sleep. Her emotions were starting to bang on the walls that she’d erected and she knew that if she didn’t get to sleep soon she would probably break down and start crying, and that was the last thing she wanted to do. She had to be strong, and make sure that her people had her as a rock to lean on for support.

“Thank you again for coming on such short notice Minister.” Lexa said as she stood up and shook his hand.

“Of course Your Majesty.” Kane replied. “And if I may be so bold, you should get some rest. It’s been a long night for you.”  
“Thank you Minister, I plan to go and do that right now actually.” She walked out of the room, Clarke following right behind her as she slipped a folded up piece of paper into the pocket of her uniform. _Glad to know she was able to keep herself occupied._ Lexa thought as they walked back to her chambers. _Usually they just sit there awkwardly during my meetings._ They eventually made it to her bedroom and Clarke opened the door for her, her eyes sweeping the room just to make sure that no one had snuck in. Everyone was on high alert.

It was when she walked in that Lexa’s emotions finally burst through the walls she had erected. If Clarke hadn’t been right behind her she would’ve hit the ground as her legs gave out underneath her. She felt a pair of surprisingly strong arms grab her and guide her to a chair. She couldn’t help herself as she curled up into her bodyguard and let the tears that had been threatening to fall since the whole ordeal had started flow freely down her face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all, your comments always mean so much to me. I honestly get giddy and all smiley whenever I get the emails saying that you guys commented.


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clarke visits Raven and talks about Lexa and her seeming lack of mourning, and Anya gives a small explanation as to why Lexa is reacting the way she is.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There's a flashback here that explains what happened to Lexa that causes her to become emotionally closed off. It does involve a heavily implied death so if you don't want to read that it's in italics at the very end of the chapter. If you choose not to read it I can give the gist of it down in the comments if you ask.

In the week that followed the death of the Queen and Consort Lexa refused to talk to Clarke about her breakdown. Clarke had only tried to bring it up twice, each time getting a stern look from Lexa, so she had stopped trying to get past her walls again. Instead she’d spent her time with Lexa staying out of the way and drawing when she could. It was surprising how many supplies she could store in the pockets of her uniform. Today however, she had a day off and was with Raven at a physical therapy appointment.

“I just don’t get it,” Clarke said, as Raven was working with the therapist. “She’s clearly hurting, how come she’s not letting anyone in?”

“Maybe your charming personality isn’t as charming as you’ve been led to believe Sergeant,” Raven grunted as she was walking with her crutches.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Clarke responded, looking at her quizzically.

“Well, let’s see, the entire time you’ve been here you’ve done nothing but talk about her. Also, your sketchbook is open.” She gestured over to where Clarke had left it on a chair. “I’ve read enough of the gossip mags to know what she looks like.”

Clarke scrambled and quickly closed the book, blushing a bit as she did so. There were more sketches of Lexa in there than she’d care to admit, but she wasn’t going give Raven the satisfaction of admitting she was right.

“Ha! I knew it!” Raven said, laughing. “Which may or may not be a good thing considering your line of work.”

“It’s not like anything would ever happen Raven.”

“And why not? Maybe she finds you attractive too. And it’s not like you guys don’t spend lots of time alone together.”

“Well, for one, I’m Arkadian.” Raven rolled her eyes as Clarke said that. “Don’t give me that. And two, I’m a commoner, she’s literally royalty. Think of the scandal. The damn Queen of the whole country hooking up with a Staff Sergeant. And her bodyguard to boot. So drop it.”

“Fine, I’ll drop it…for now.” Raven’s attention went to the door. “Who’s Cheekbones over there?” She nodded her head towards the door.

Clarke turned her head to look where Raven was looking and noticed Anya looking through the door. “Oh, that’s Lieutenant Woods. She was, actually probably still is, the head of Lexa’s protective detail.”

“Lexa’s?” Raven asked, a smirk on her face.

“Queen Alexandria II’s,” Clarke said as she rolled her eyes. “And I wonder what she’s doing here.”

“Clearly here to see the perfection that is me.” Raven said. Clarke could only roll her eyes in response.

“You wish.” Clarke watched as Anya walked over. “Lieutenant, what brings you here?”

“I’m here to see the perfection that is Corporal Reyes.” Anya smirked as Raven held in a laugh. “Actually, I wanted to talk to you about Her Majesty.”

“Oh, alright.” Clarke looked over at Raven with an apologetic look on her face.

“Don’t worry about me, I’ll still be here.” Raven gave her a wink before going back to her therapist.

Clarke nodded as she walked off with Anya. Eventually they made their way to an empty waiting room and sat down.

Anya took a deep breath before speaking. “So, from the short time I’ve known you I can tell that you’re a caring person. And that’s probably part of why you’re as good as you are as a medic. That being said, Her Majesty’s current state isn’t one that you can easily fix.”

“I was just trying,” Clarke started before Anya cut her off.

“This isn’t the first time this has happened with her.” Anya replies. “She once lost someone close to her and she retreated into a shell for months. She has been back to ‘normal’ for a while, but she hasn’t been as happy as she was before.”

“Oh…who did she lose?” Clarke asked.

“That, Clarke, is not my story to tell.” Anya said as she stood up. “That’s something she will have to tell you. The only thing I can tell you is that it was my fault.”

“Your fault? But, you’re now the head of her protection detail.”

“Technically I did the right thing, but sometimes what is technically right isn’t what you should do.” Anya walked out the door, leaving Clarke in the waiting room thinking.

 

_Two years previous_

_Lexa and Costia were at one of Lexa’s charity galas. It was a couple days before their anniversary, but they had decided to use the gala as a bit of a pre-celebration since Lexa’s galas tended to be more fun than her parents’ parties. Probably because the people their tended to be closer to their age and they had more in common._

_“Excellent party babe.” Costia said as she returned with a couple drinks to Lexa’s side. “Lots of people here buying things, should raise a lot of money.”_

_“Yeah, we’ll be able to help a lot of kids with it.” Lexa replied, taking a sip of her champagne. “Thanks for coming.” She squeezed Costia with her open arm._

_“Anything for you. Love you.”_

_“Love you too.” Lexa smiled at her. “Party should be over soon, then we can head back to the palace.”_

_“I can’t wait.” Costia sighed contently._

_After a couple hours the party wound down. They’d raised a record number of money for the Nightblood Children’s Charity. Lexa was really proud of what they’d done and felt that nothing could bring down her mood. She was wrong._

_“We’re ready to go Sergeant Woods.” Lexa said as she grabbed her coat from one of the staff._

_“Ok Your Highness.” Anya replied, taking a flanking position with Gustus on the other side of them. As they walked out she took notice of the small group of persistent protestors that had been there all night._

_“Damn Arkadians.” Anya muttered under her breath as they guided the couple towards the waiting limousine. As they walked she took another glance over at the protestors. The light from a streetlight glinted off something and it took a moment for it to click in Anya’s mind what it was._

_“Gun!” She yelled, grabbing Lexa and pushing her towards the limo as an explosion of sound erupted from the gun._

_“Where’s Costia?!” Lexa was screaming as she was shoved into the limo. “Make sure you get her!”_

_“I need to get you to safety ma’am.” Anya said, trying to keep her composure. “I’m sure she’s going to be ok.”_

_She wasn’t. When they got back from the palace they heard the news. Lexa spent three months emotionally withdrawn, and Anya had attempted to resign, but was instead given her commission and promoted to the head of Lexa’s security detail after some convincing from the Royal Couple. While Lexa insisted she didn’t blame Anya for what happened, Anya couldn’t forgive herself._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We will be getting some fluffier chapters in the near future I promise. I'm not going to just stay down here in a pit of emotion.


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The funeral for Lexa's parents is held. Clarke and Lexa return to the palace where they bond over their shared losses.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys, before you get started there is a panic attack in this chapter. If you don't want to read that part you can skip from where it says "Lexa tried, she tried really hard to keep calm," down to "By the time she was fully calmed down they were back at the palace."
> 
> Also, since it's my birthday I decided I'd give this chapter to you guys today as a gift! (At least, it was my birthday when I started it, by the time I post it it probably won't be anymore, at least according to AO3.)

Clarke hated funerals. She’d almost not gone to her father’s funeral, but in the end she’d gone because she needed the closure. And even with the spectacle that came with a royal funeral it didn’t make it any better. She was seated next to Lexa in the front row of the church; a truly massive building that had been around for almost 500 years. Stained glass adorned the walls, with a massive rose window above the doors. The High Priestess was giving the service, standing at the altar as she spoke to the assembled crowd.

“Our Holy Book tells us that when we leave this mortal plane that we are taken to a city with no name. A city that is filled with light. A place without pain or suffering. Kind words, words that we often repeat to those that are mourning in an effort to cheer them up.

“But those words often ring hollow in our ears. They’re seen as a platitude, something that’s said to us when the person speaking has nothing of substance to say. We know what they mean, but when you’re mourning it seems meaningless.

“Here we are, we’re a nation in mourning. But what we can forget is that there’s something more important than us as a nation mourning. There is a daughter who has lost her parents, and lost them suddenly, and in a way that no one should lose their parents. How many of us in our own grief have thought about that? Thought about the young woman who has now been thrust onto the world stage? So to Your Majesty,” she looked directly at Lexa. “I offer my sincerest condolences, and hopefully those of the entire country.”

With the end of her short sermon the funeral was over, with Lexa and her security detail leaving first. They walked out the front door, where more Grounders were stationed in a line far away from the door. Off to one side there appeared to be a protest happening. Clarke couldn’t keep herself from glaring in that direction.   
“Seriously, on the day of the funeral?” She whispered to herself. She had half a mind to give them a peace of her mind, but her attention was grabbed by Lexa beside her. She looked over at her and realized she was having a panic attack.

 

Lexa had tried, she’d tried really hard to keep calm, but seeing the protestors had triggered memories of that night two years ago. She felt her throat constrict and her lungs felt like they were filled with concrete. She felt Clarke hurry her to the limo and gently lead into the car.

“You’re ok.” She heard Clarke say. _No I’m not_. She wanted to respond, but she couldn’t. _I’m dying. This is it, I hope Clarke’s going to be ok._ That last thought surprised her. It was then that she realized that Clarke was talking to her.

“Lexa, I want you to match my breathing.” Clarke said. “Breath in, hold, now out.”

Lexa wanted to say that she couldn’t, but she surprisingly found herself calming down and matching Clarke’s breathing. By the time she was fully calmed down they were back at the palace.

Clarke stepped out first and offered her hand which Lexa gratefully accepted, trying to ignore the feeling that was sparked by such a simple act. They didn’t talk the entire way up to Lexa’s chambers. When they stepped in Clarke took her normal seat while Lexa’s attendant’s helped her change out of her funeral clothes. After the attendants left Lexa sat and watched as Clarke drew in the sketchbook that she kept there. After about a minute Lexa cleared her throat.

Clarke looked up and closed the sketchbook, giving Lexa her full attention.

“I want to apologize for what happened after the funeral.” Lexa started. But before she could continue Clarke raised her hand.

“There’s nothing to apologize for Your Majesty,” she said. “You’re not the first person I helped through a panic attack. There’s nothing to be ashamed of.”

Lexa nodded her head in understanding. “You at least deserve an explanation. The protestors reminded me of an event that happened two years ago.” She closed her eyes to blink away tears. It was still hard for her to talk about it.

“Is this what Lieutenant Woods was talking about?” Lexa opened her eyes and tried to keep her face from showing how surprised she was. Anya was usually more discreet about that. Clarke must’ve noticed because she continued. “She didn’t tell me what happened, just that you lost someone close to you and that it was her fault.”

Lexa’s face softened as she spoke. “Anya did her job. I was her principal responsibility. It’s a night that’s weighed on both of us for a while.”

Lexa started to go into the details of what had happened two years ago to Costia, how the assassin had used the protestors as a cover. Clarke didn’t interrupt the entire time, allowing Lexa to get the words out and the weight off her chest.

 

Clarke listened as Lexa explained what had happened and why the crowd had unnerved her so. She felt her heart breaking while she spoke and was confused by how strong the feelings were. She momentarily thought back to her conversation with Raven and realized that maybe her friend was right. But even if she was there was nothing she could do about it. There were too many obstacles between them. After Lexa was done telling her story Clarke gave her a kind smile.

“Thanks for telling me that,” she said. “It means a lot to me that you trust me with that.” Lexa gave her a small smile in response.

Clarke took a deep breath. She didn’t fully know why, probably because Lexa had shared one of her worst memories with her, but she started telling Lexa what happened with her dad.

“So, before I joined the military I was in college.” She said, taking a steadying breath. “I was in the pre-med program and was in my junior year of college when the Ark University Bombing happened.”

She watched as Lexa nodded her head in understanding. It had happened the same year as Costia’s death and Clarke briefly wondered if Lexa was somewhat relieved by that since the bombing had dominated the news cycle.

“My Dad was visiting. He wanted to surprise me.” Clarke had to take a moment to wipe some tears away, surprised at how visceral the feelings were. “He’d finally been able to get away from work. Some big project his engineering firm had been working on. It doesn’t really matter.

“He was walking past the library when the blast struck. I didn’t even know he was there until my mom called me asking if he was ok. I never got to say goodbye.” Clarke once again had to wipe away her tears. “After his funeral I dropped out of college and joined the military. I guess I was probably running away from everything. My background in pre-med led to me becoming a medic and eventually finding my way here.” She tried to give Lexa as reassuring smile as she could give. She was used to people pitying her whenever they heard her story, but when she looked at her beautiful green eyes she didn’t see pity, just understanding and empathy.

“Thanks for sharing that with me. It seems we both have baggage in our past.” She said. “Seems that maybe we were just trying to survive.”

“Well, maybe life is about more than just surviving.” Clarke said, smiling a bit more than she had in Lexa’s presence. Probably in a few years.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There we go! Clexa bonding time over lost loved ones. Pretty soon we're going to have bad ass Clarke defending Lexa, don't you worry.


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clarke and Lexa go to a fundraiser gala for the Nightblood Children's Charity.
> 
> Clarke also protects Lexa for the first time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You guys wanted her, hopefully I did a good enough job. Badass Clarke is here!

During the month after the funeral Clarke found herself talking with Lexa more and more. It was amazing what sharing your worst memories could do for a relationship. The problem for Clarke however, was that she was falling for Lexa.

“I honestly don’t understand how this is a problem Clarke.” Raven said. “It’s not like you’re straight. And everyone knows that she isn’t.”

Clarke stood at the end of the bars Raven was using at her PT appointment. “We’ve been over this Raven.”

“Yeah, we have, multiple times, and I still think you’re being ridiculous about this. You said you guys were talking more right? Maybe start dropping some hints. See what her reaction is.”

“I can’t. I actually really like my job Rae.” Clarke huffed. “First rule of being in the Grounders, no dating the principle.”

“Really? I thought it was ‘look good in black’.”

“Rule number two.” Clarke stuck her tongue out at her.

Raven returned the favor before going back to concentrating on what she was trying to do. “How are you able to get so many days off? And you don’t have to be here for my appointments.”

“I’m working later tonight. Lexa has a charity fundraiser to be at. I think Lieutenant Wood’s on protection duty right now. Probably finalizing the protection details for tonight.”

“Ah, Lieutenant Cheekbones.”

“Don’t let her hear you say that. She’s a very serious person.” Clarke said as she gave Raven a look.

“Oh I know, she visits occasionally.” Raven smirked.

“She does? Why on Earth would she do that?”

“Clearly it’s because I’m sexy as hell.” Raven laughed at the look Clarke gave her. “And you never answered my second question.”

“Hm?” Clarke said.

“Don’t play dumb. Why do you come to my appointments?”

“It’s my fault you’re here.” Clarke sighed. “I should’ve done more when you got wounded.”

Raven rolled her eyes in response. “I’m the one who got shot. And you did what you could. There was very little you could’ve done. You also saved what, 75% of our unit when you got to the radio?” She waited for Clarke to nod. “So stop beating yourself up, you did what you had to do to get most of us out.”

“Alright. Thanks.” Clarke checked her watch. “I’ve got to get going and get ready for the gala. I’ll see you next time.”

“Yep, see you next time.” Raven grunted as she continued on with her appointment.

 

Clarke was going over the final preparations for the night with Anya when the lieutenant handed her a pair of contact lenses.

“Um…my eyesight’s pretty good, honest.” Clarke said, looking down at the contacts.

“They’re night vision contacts. Ever used night vision before?” Anya scoffs.

“Yes, but are you expecting something to happen during the gala?”  
“No, but we weren’t expecting anything at the gala a month ago either.” Anya says coldly.

“Oh…right.” Clarke said. “How do they work?”

“Put them in and I’ll show you.”

Clarke looked in the mirror and carefully placed the lenses on her eyes. Immediately afterwards the room went pitch black. A split second later Clarke’s vision went green as the lenses kicked on.

“Whoa…that’s impressive.” Clarke said as she looked around.

“Once again, the best for us. Have to keep the royal person safe.” Anya said as she turned the lights back on. “Sensors detect when you’ll need the night vision and kick on.”

“Thanks. Hopefully I won’t need it.”  
“That’s what we always hope for.”

 

Clarke was by Lexa’s side the entire night. Normally the bodyguard kept a respectful distance, but after the death of her parents no one wanted to take a chance on her safety. Lexa was an only child and would’ve been the end of the Trikru dynasty in Trigeda. Lexa shuttered a bit at that thought, but quickly schooled her body back into submission. She was here to raise money for Nightblood Children’s Charity, not think about dynastic politics. There was plenty of time to worry about succession later. Now, was convincing these rich snobs to part with their money, which was easy whenever you brought up the possibility of a royal warrant for whatever goods their company produced.

Right now, however, she was busy trying to get away from the Chancellor of Arkadia, who’d somehow come under the impression that now was the perfect time to talk to her about the current round of police crackdowns.

“Chancellor Pike, there are official channels for you to talk to me.” She sighed in exasperation, having repeated herself for what felt like the fifteenth time. Luckily the Arkadian assembly was an advisory council and had no actual power. However, Pike was supposed to have been a compromise candidate, and instead turned out to be a right asshole.

“Your people have been ignoring my inquiries. I had to come all the way out here just to get a moment of your time.” Pike responded, his voice a bit louder than necessary.

“Maybe they’ve rejected your requests for an audience because I’ve been mourning my parents.” Lexa felt good at the wince she saw from the larger man. “And your issues wouldn’t have come up if your countrymen hadn’t killed them. If the ARA is willing to talk peace we’ll talk peace. I’m sure you know how to get a hold of them.”

“I…I’d have to talk to them.” Pike said, cowering a bit. “May take a bit, they don’t tend to stay in one place long.”

Clarke cut in at that moment. “There’s a mirror in the restroom if you need to have a chat.”

Pike looked about ready to come at Clarke but that’s when the lights shut off.

 

Clarke blinked for a moment until her contacts kicked in. “Your Majesty, let’s go.” She quickly grabbed Lexa’s arm and guided her towards the back of the auditorium, where the designated “escape path” was. She saw the other Grounders start to make their way to follow them. She and Lexa were the first ones to the kitchen doors and were waiting for the rest of the detail when the first assailant burst through the doors.

Clarke instantly sprang into action, she’d learned a lot from her training sessions with Lincoln and before she knew she was reacting her knife was in her left hand and darting forward. Her combat training had taught her how to stab, but her medical training was actually more useful in telling her where to stab. Before the assailant knew what had happened he was bleeding out on the ground. Clarke grabbed the second assailant’s gun and was able to surprise him long enough to knock his teeth out with the butt before starting to push Lexa towards the secondary exit. She hears the all too familiar sound of a bullet whizzing by her and turned, her knife going back to the holster next to her gun which she snapped up, returning fire as she kept herself between Lexa and the would be assassins. One, two, three of them went down before the other Grounders stormed in. Clarke however was ushering Lexa out through a side door, Anya, Lincoln, and Gustus beside them as they rushed Lexa into the waiting limo.

“Well…that was certainly more exciting than I expected.” Clarke said, starting to come down off her adrenaline high.

“Yeah…it certainly was.” Lexa replied, wincing a bit when she adjusted herself on the seat. “Well, that’s not supposed to be like that.” She looked at her hand.

“What?!” Clarke said, grabbing her hand and quickly examining it. “It looks worse than it really is. Must’ve been grazed during the shootout.” She took a towel from the minibar and dabbed at the wound. “I can take care of this back at the palace.”

“Alright.”

Once they got back to the palace Clarke and Lexa were escorted immediately into the Royal Bunker. They were still on lockdown due to the attack so Lexa and Clarke resigned themselves to staying the night in the bunker. They walked in and Lexa started to change out of her evening dress. Clarke was mildly shocked, and tried to look away, but she couldn’t help herself. She was, however, able to look away before Lexa had finished and turned back to her.

“So, you said you could take care of this?” She motioned with her hand.

“Of course.” Clarke replied, grabbing a first aid kit and motioning towards a chair. She knelt down beside Lexa and started bandaging it up. “I’ve definitely seen worse.” She said when she sealed the bandage.

“Well, thank you…for saving my life.”

“Of course. It’s my job.” Clarke said. She was about to say something else when she felt Lexa’s lips on hers.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay! I meant to write this earlier, but family things and Jessica Jones distracted me.


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clexa kissed! Now they have to discuss their feelings right? Maybe...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry guys! I have no excuse except for a lack of inspiration to write. But here you go!

Lexa barely knew what was happening. Clarke had bandaged up her hand, and Lexa had felt the urge to kiss her. It was probably due to the adrenaline high almost getting killed gave her, but damn if it didn’t feel right. And the best part was that Clarke was kissing her back. She felt Clarke’s tongue on her bottom lip and she opened her mouth to let her tongue in while suppressing a moan at the feeling.

She started to bring her hands up Clarke’s body when her bodyguard broke off, breathing heavily.

“Your Majesty. We can’t.” she said, and Lexa’s heart sank.

“I am the Queen.” Lexa said, knowing that the words wouldn’t have the effect she wanted them to have.

“And I’m your bodyguard. We can’t do this. Besides, you’re coming down off an adrenaline high. This…this won’t work.” Clarke looked down at the floor.

“You’re right. I’m sorry.” Lexa said as she laid down on the bed in there.

 

It’d been three weeks since Lexa had kissed her that Clarke was woken up roughly by Anya in the middle of the night.

“Wake up!” Anya shook her. “Damnit Clarke wake the hell up!”

“I’m up, I’m up.” Clarke slurred as she sat up groggily. “Where’s the fire?”

“Under your ass if you don’t get dressed in five minutes.” Anya said, shoving Clarke’s uniform into her arms.

Clarke pulled her shirt over her head and was pulling her pants on while Anya talked.

“The Queen’s having a nightmare, and we can’t wake her up.”

“How am I supposed to help?” Clarke said grumpily.

“She’s mentioned your name multiple times.” Anya said as Clarke whipped her head towards her.

“Me? Why would she mention me?” Clarke looked at Anya quizzically.

“We don’t know, she’s asleep.”  
“Alright.”

Five minutes later Clarke was walking into Lexa’s chambers quietly. She was sweating profusely and mumbling under her breath.

“No…Clarke, please…”

Clarke reached a hand out to her shoulder and shook her gently. “Lexa…I’m right here, everything’s ok.”

She let out an “Oof!” when Lexa snapped awake and grabbed her into a tight hug.

“Your Majesty, you're squeezing me too hard.” Clarke wheezed as Lexa slowly let up on the pressure, not letting go. “I’m right here. It was just a bad dream.”

“I know…”

“Want to tell me about it?” Clarke said, raising an eyebrow.

“Sure…”

 

Lexa was back at the Gala. She was mingling with the people there when the lights went out again just like last time. This time however, no one tried to attack her. Instead it was Clarke that was the target. She relived the moment multiple times, each time ending with Clarke dying trying to protect her. “Clarke…please…stay with me…” she would say as Clarke was bleeding out before her. “May we meet again.” Clarke would say before the dream would start back up. This time however she heard Clarke’s voice coming from outside the dream. “Lexa…I’m right here, everything’s ok.” She snapped her eyes open and saw the beautiful blonde hair that she’d been seeing in her dreams. She quickly grabbed hold of Clarke, not wanting to ever let her go. “Your Majesty, you’re squeezing too hard.”

 

After recounting her dream to Clarke Lexa was feeling a lot better. However when the bodyguard made to leave Lexa grabbed her wrist.

“Please…stay with me…” she said as she blushed. “Just for tonight…sorry, you probably want to sleep in your bed.”

“Military life prepared me for sleeping in strange beds Your Majesty. If you need me to I’ll stay here.” Clarke smiled at her.

 

The next morning Lexa woke up with an unfamiliar weight on her body. As she woke up more she realized that in the middle of the night Clarke had latched onto her and was cuddling in close to her. She groaned internally as her feelings came roaring back to the forefront of her mind. She definitely didn’t need to know that Clarke was a cuddler. She definitely didn’t need to think about waking up like this years from now when they were both old. No, Clarke was right three weeks ago. Their relationship would be way too complicated, especially with her being the Queen. She sighed softly, and then felt Clarke start to stir. Running her fingers through her hair Lexa was able to get Clarke to settle back down. It was still early, and she had disturbed her sleep. Besides, she had a lot of thinking that she needed to do, and needed to do alone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading guys! Once again I'm sorry for how long it took to write and how short it is, but hopefully you liked it!


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clarke wakes up with her arms wrapped tight around Lexa and nearly jumps out of her skin. Anya reads Clarke the riot act and Lexa comes to an important decision.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! Sorry this took so long, but it's here! I promised I wouldn't abandon this and here's the new chapter. Hopefully the chapters will be able to come out faster now that I've got it going in a direction I can continue.

Clarke woke up to someone running their fingers through her hair. She waited a moment before cuddling up closer to whoever she had latched on to in the middle of the night. It felt good and warm and reminded her of when her father would hold her when she was little. She took a big breath in to try to maybe get a hint of her father’s cologne. Instead, she caught a decidedly different scent. A recently familiar scent. Lexa’s scent.

Her eyes flew open and she nearly jumped out of the bed. “I’m so sorry Your Majesty…I don’t know what came over me.” She was starting to back up when Lexa held up a hand to stop her.

“Clarke, it’s ok. I’m the one that asked you to stay.” She said, looking up at Clarke. “It…it was nice.”

“Oh.” Clarke said, blushing. “I liked what you were doing too.”

She sat down on the bed and grabbed Lexa’s hand and started rubbing the back of it with her thumb. “Sorry about not telling you about my cuddling tendencies though.” She said with a sheepish grin.

“I didn’t mind. Costia was a cuddler too.” Lexa said as she smiled at the fond memories. “I was just surprised when I woke up. I didn’t wake you did I?”

“I don’t think so. I was starting to wake up anyway.” Clarke said as she got back up. “I need to get back to the barracks and get ready for today.”

“See you later Clarke.”

“Until later Your Majesty.”

 

Clarke intended to go back to her quarters when she got back to the barracks, but she was disabused of that notion when Anya walked up to her.

“Conference room. Now.” She said, not waiting to see if Clarke was following as she walked to the room. Clarke walked in after her and took a seat across from her at the table. She twiddled her thumbs as she waited for Anya to tell her what was going on.

“You didn’t come back last night.” It wasn’t a question.

“Her majesty requested I stay the night with her. Apparently she wanted my presence there in the room.” Clarke stated.

“Nothing else? She just wanted you to be in the room?” Anya glared at her.

“She asked me to sleep with her. And that’s all we did.”

“That’s it? Nothing else?” Anya was still glaring at her.

“I…” Clarke looked down. “I may have latched on and cuddled with her in the middle of the night.”

She regrets the words almost as soon as they leave her mouth when Anya’s eyes nearly bug out of her skull.

“You. Did. What?!” she says, the sound of her teeth grinding audible to Clarke’s ears even across the table.

“It’s nothing. She didn’t”

“I don’t care!” Anya said as she leaned across the table. “You knew your duty! One more step out of line and you’ll be back with your old unit so fast your head will spin.”  
“I didn’t mean to ok?! It just happened while I was asleep!”

“I meant it Griffin, one last chance.”

“Fine, nothing is going to happen. Permission to go back to my quarters?”

“Granted.” Anya said, pulling out some paperwork she needed to get done.

Clarke left the room faster than she’d ever left a room before.

 

As soon as the door closed behind Clarke Lexa laid back down on her bed. All she could think about was how good it felt to have Clarke’s arms wrapped around her. Even better than the days she had woken up in Costia’s arms. She sighed as she kept running the different reasons why a relationship between her and Clarke wouldn’t work. For one, she was her bodyguard, secondly, she was Arkadian. Her butler Titus would probably have an aneurysm if that were to happen. Though, as Lexa thought about it more, she might not miss him that much. He’d always been aloof and cold to her, even when she was younger. One reason that Lexa wasn’t too worried about was Clarke being a commoner. That didn’t matter anymore, just like the fact that she wasn’t married off to some foreign prince to solidify a political arrangement.

The more she thought about it the more that she was able to justify pursuing a relationship with Clarke. The only thing she would have to do was try to convince Clarke that it was a good idea. And probably Anya too. The lieutenant was a bit stuffy at times.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! Hope you guys enjoyed it! And as always, I love seeing your thoughts in the comments.


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Little bit of Ranya at the beginning, and Lexa has the frustrating tasks of state combined with trying to convince Clarke to date her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright, so I'm a horrible person. Sorry it's been so long. I don't really have an excuse, just that I know where I'm eventually going, I just need to figure out how to get there.

Raven was back in the physical therapy room. She’d made some good progress, but still needed the crutches most of the time. She tried to keep her spirits up, but it was hard to keep them up when for every three steps forward she took in her therapy she took two steps back. At least Clarke was often there to keep her company during the appointments. This time, Clarke and the Queen were off at some state function, or maybe Her Majesty just wanted to spend some time at her northern residence, Raven couldn’t remember. That didn’t mean, however, that she was alone at this appointment.

“Well, hello there Lieutenant Woods.” She said as she continued to walk along the bars. “Clarke’s not here at the moment.”

“I’m aware of where Sergeant Griffin is Corporal Reyes.” Anya said, as she sat down and watched. “This also isn’t the first time I’ve been here.”

“You’re right. Which begs the question, why?”

“Why what?” Anya said, raising an eyebrow.

“Why do you keep coming back?” Raven grunted, slumping into her chair.

“Maybe I want to keep an eye on your progress?” Anya said, pulling a chair over and sitting next to her.

“If I didn’t know any better I’d say you came to see the Raven Reyes show.” Raven smirked, chuckling when she saw Anya blush.

 

Lexa paced back and forth in her office in the royal palace. On her desk were the latest war reports from the front against the Mountain. While it could’ve been going better, the offensive was still pushing forward. Hopefully by the time winter started closing off some of the passes they’d be close to the capital.

Also on her desk were the beginnings of the plans for the Winter Festival happening in two months’ time. She figured that maybe she’d be able to warm Clarke up to the idea of them dating in time for the festivities, as they were almost the only time she was able to actually relax and have fun.

She rubbed her temples as she sat back down, frustration evident on her face as she set the war reports aside and went back to the festival planning. The war was going as well as a war could be expected to be, but the current planning for the festival was proving to somehow be more difficult.

“Coordinate thousands of combat troops across an entire nation, easy. Plan a winter festival that’s been happening for generations? Somehow impossible.” She muttered to herself as she looked over all the stuff that still had to be done for it. For some reason, the recent spate of attacks on the royal family was keeping people from wanting to cater and provide entertainment for the event. She sighed, normally the monarch’s consort would be the one in charge of planning this, but unfortunately, Lexa was still very single. As she flipped through the pages and made notes about who had already said no and who had yet to respond she felt a pair of hands grab her shoulders and start massaging.

 

Clarke was in her position near the door of Lexa’s office watching her get more and more frustrated with her work. Clarke was trying her best to ignore the different frustrated noises coming from Her Majesty’s desk. However, she had to look up from her sketches when she heard Lexa flop down into her chair with a huff.

When she looked over at Lexa it was obvious that the Queen was very tense with the preparations. She heard Lexa mutter under her breath about the ease of which she was able to coordinate her troops in the field and the inability to plan the traditional Trigedan Winter Festival. Clarke had participated in some Trigedan traditions as part of her military service, but Arkadia still held firm to their own traditions, which was made easier when they were still segregated into separate units.

After a few more minutes of Lexa muttering frustrated obscenities decided she’d had enough of it and walked behind her and started rubbing her shoulders, trying to ignore the pleased sounds coming from Lexa as she rubbed the tension away.

“Sometimes you need to take some time for yourself Your Majesty.” She said, working on the knots in Lexa’s shoulders.

“Well, if I get this any time I need to get relax than I just might.” Lexa responded, sounding a little flirtatious as she did so.

“Well, people do say that I’m pretty good at giving massages. Whenever you’re getting knots over stuff like this just ask.”

“Oh, rest assured, I definitely will.”

Clarke couldn’t help the smile on her face as she kept working on Lexa’s shoulders.


	13. Chapter 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clexa talk about the Winter Festival, and Lexa tells Anya about a major decision she's planning on making.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What?! An update?! Yes, I'm so sorry it took so long. It's not extra long or anything and I apologize, but I had writer's block for this and had to figure out where I'm going. So sorry it took so long. I don't think it should take that long next time.

The Winter Festival was a month closer and Lexa wasn’t any nearer to talking to Clarke about attending with her than she was a month previous. Every time she attempted to bring it up Clarke thought that she just wanted some help with the planning. At least that was going better.

The mountain passes necessary to advance towards the Mountain’s capital were blocked up with snow, making the continued invasion impractical. But without the need to be planning the moves and countermoves against the Mountain she was able to get more of the planning done for the Festival. Right now she was having issues trying to make sure security was going to be all set for her to be able to go.

“Spirits damnit Anya, you can’t keep me away from the Winter Festival!” She said in a huff. “1000 years of the monarch overseeing the festival should not be undone just because of one assassination attempt!”

“Your Majesty, we have to consider the security risks.” Anya sighed.

“I have considered the risks Anya!” Lexa replied, growing angry. “That’s what I pay you for right? How many guards do we have?”

“Between the 1st, 2nd, and 3rd Grounder Regiments we have 8,500 soldiers defending the various residences.” Anya rattled off looking up at the ceiling.

“And what you’re telling me is that between the 8,500 of you, you can’t protect me during the winter festival?”

“Fine, we’ll get everything drawn up.” Anya gathered up her things. “With your leave Your Majesty.”

“You may go Anya.” Lexa said as Anya bowed her way out the door.

 

Clarke watched as Anya walked out of Lexa’s office. She decide to poke her head in and see how the meeting had gone.

“If looks could kill, I’d at the very least be very bruised Your Majesty.” She said mirthfully as she bowed. “I take it that Anya wasn’t able to convince you about the Winter Festival?”

“There’s nothing to convince me of. It’s the Winter Festival, the Monarch attends and oversees the Festival. Thousands of years of tradition Clarke.”

“Thousands of years of traditions are important, but you have survived two separate assassination attempts Your Majesty.” Clarke said somberly as she remembered the incident at the Gala.

“Survived being the operative word there Clarke. Thanks to both Anya and yourself.” Lexa replied, looking back down at her paperwork.

“Yes, but that doesn’t mean that the security risks aren’t going to be greater here. The Winter Festival is a very tempting target.”

“But, it would also hurt their cause with the greater population of Trigeda.” Lexa said looking over the top of the paperwork as Clarke sat down.

“True, but when has the ARA ever given a shit about what the population of Trigeda thinks?”

“They have some measure of what the opinion of the people is. They realize that if they were to ever actually achieve independence it would require the common people to actually sympathize with them rather than actively hate them. The Winter Festival is too obvious of a target. Of course we’ll have increased security though.”

“That’s good. Do you have any idea as to who your partner will be for the Spirit Welcoming Ceremony?” Clarke asked.

Clarke noticed that it took Lexa a little bit before she answered. “I have yet to ask anyone, and I have yet to give serious thought to it. That position comes with a lot of political baggage.”

Clarke nodded her head. Usually the Consort was the one who partnered with the Sovereign in order to welcome the spirits back to the nation and lead them back to Spring. But, in the absence of a Consort it was often seen that whoever the partner was would be at the front of the line to become the new Consort.

“Well, the Festival is in a month, so you probably need to get on that sooner rather than later.”

“I know, it’s a harder decision than I thought it would be.” Lexa said, looking more closely at some of the paperwork. If Clarke didn’t know any better she would say that Lexa was trying to hide her face from here.

“Well, I’m sure you’ll be able to make the right decision.” Clarke said as she picked up her sketchbook and started drawing some more.

 

The next day Lexa was getting dressed by her maid as she talked with Anya about the coming day.

“So, I’ve been thinking.” Lexa said, rolling her eyes as she saw Anya shudder. “And don’t give me that ‘Always a dangerous activity’ line.”

“Well Your Majesty,” Anya said. “Thinking can be dangerous. Especially for a Sovereign.”

“Well anyways, Lieutenant.” Lexa shot back. “I was thinking about asking Clarke to be my partner for the welcoming ceremony.”

Anya’s face went on a journey of emotions as what Lexa said sank in. “What?!” she exclaimed. “That’s…Your Majesty! Really?!”


End file.
